


It's a Whale of a Tale, But Minus the Tail?

by Bowdowntoniall



Category: One Direction
Genre: I'm really sorry about the length :((, M/M, almost forgot to submit it, i wrote this between about 5 exams
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-14
Updated: 2015-02-14
Packaged: 2018-03-12 08:12:16
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,555
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3349613
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bowdowntoniall/pseuds/Bowdowntoniall
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Zayn... hey Zayn... wake up. Come on now. Zayn? Zayn, we have legs, ya hear me bro, legs."</p>
<p>Or the one where Zayn and Harry wake up as changed men, and Niall just happened to be passing by.</p>
            </blockquote>





	It's a Whale of a Tale, But Minus the Tail?

**Author's Note:**

  * For [brokendrums](https://archiveofourown.org/users/brokendrums/gifts).



   "Zayn... hey Zayn... wake up. Come on now. Zayn? Zayn, we have legs, ya hear me bro, _legs_."

   "Harry shut up and go to sleep you're drunk."

   "No, Zayn I'm being serious, like, alright maybe I'm slightly drunk, but it's just the leftover buzz from yesterday, and I'm not joking like, there's two legs coming out of our bodies. An Zayn?"

   Zayn sat up and glared at Harry. Doesn't he have any common curtesy? First he drags him out for drinks at 11 PM on Valentine's Day because, "who knows Zayn, maybe you'll find the one." and then he ditches him about 14 minutes in for some blond chick (who was rude as hell actually, took Zayn's drink right from his hand, Harry must've been pretty drunk.) and now here he is trying to wake him up from his beautiful, quiet, sleep.

   Zayn turns to glare at Harry, but sucks in a sharp breath of air as something sharp digs into his side. "Ouch, what the hell is tha- oh my god."

   Zayn looks at the two long, spindly legs digging into his side with wide eyes. Harry smiles apologetically and draws back his legs to his chest, "Sorry mate, not fully sure how to control 'em yet. They're like, longer than I thought legs were supposed to be, or is this a normal length, I'm not really sure I've never seen legs in person ya know?"

   Zayn just blinks at Harry because this can't be real, no way. This isn't something that just happens, he has to be asleep still.

   He's having a drunken dream. Yeah. That's it, he decides. He's dreaming. It's kinda weird to dream about his mate turn human and then waking up on a beach cuddling him, _but hey he's dreamt of weirder things before if he's gonna be honest._

   "So if I pinch myself will I wake up or is that just a myth?" Zayn rubs his eyes tiredly. Honestly it doesn't feel much like a dream. He's exhausted, and highly hungover, temples pounding from whatever he had to drink last night. _What did I have to drink last night?_

   "What?"

   "Like, will hurting myself really wake me up or will I have to just wait this out?" Zayn would really like to go back to sleep now, a normal, dreamless sleep. He can feel the nausea setting in from all the movement and noise around him, and nothing sounds better to him than another 11 hours of sleep.

   Harry tilted his head, "This isn't, I mean, you aren't sleeping?" he finished with a questioning tone.

   Zayn shook his head and sighed. "Yeah, okay then, I'm gonna pinch myself now," Zayn grabbed some skin on his arm, "but it's been really nice talking to you Human Harry, honestly." Slowly he pinched his two fingers together, making sure to close his eyes for luck.

    He couldn't tell if he'd woken up at first, nothing felt different. He still has a pounding headache and everything was still fairly more dry than what he's used to under water, but Human Harry has gone quiet, so taking it as a good sign Zayn opened his eyes.

  At first all Zayn saw was murky green, but as he blinked into focus he was shocked with a very close Harry. "This isn't really a dream you know?"

   "What the _fuck!_ " Zayn pushed himself away from Harry and pinched his arm again quickly making sure to go harder than last time, squeezing until he knows they'll be little crescent moons on his arm.

   This has got to be a dream, he held his breath, said a quick little prayer in his head, then opened his eyes again.

   "No, there is no _fucking_ way." All around Zayn was sand and rocks, and that's when he realizes that he's _on shore_ , and how in the hell is he still alive right now? It'd help if he'd knew how long he's been there but either way he can't have much more time until he needs water, so he decided he should get to the sea first and ask questions later.

   Harry makes a gurgling noise in the back of his throat as Zayn pushes him away yelling out a quick, "Bro!" but Zayn's on a mission and nothing's going to stop him from getting home.

   Zayn pushes himself up, so he's leaning on his forearms, and makes a move so he sit on his tail, but it's then that he realizes, he's got no tail. Zayn widens his eyes and looks down to see that not only is his tail missing, but he's got two things sticking out of his body, _legs_. And _holy fuck_ , _why is he naked?_

   "See Zayn, I told you so, we've got legs! Like, I didn't believe it at first either but once I kicked them around a few times, and I may've kicked you a few times too sorry I can't really remember, if you've got a bruise it was probably me, but anyways after I moved them I was like, woah. And- Zayn? You alright?"

   Zayn looked over at Harry. "Am I alright?" Zayn stared at Harry with wide, wild eyes and laughed. "Am I alright?" He repeated. "No, Harry, of course I'm not! I'm, I'm human!" Zayn was laughing uncontrollably at this point, eyes scrunched up, head tossed back, and tears running down his face, "Holy shit we're humans!"

  Harry stared at Zayn with wide eyes but slowly started to chuckle too. "Yeah, I guess we are."

   The two looked at each other and paused. "We're humans." Zayn said again.

   This time they both started to laugh at the absurdity of their situation. They were naked, on a beach in God knows where, with no way of knowing how to get home.

   Once they calmed themselves down Zayn looked out over the horizon where the sun was starting to rise. It was beautiful out here actually, the sky a pretty purple with light oranges and pinks making an appearance for the first time this morning, while the beach was long and lined with tall dune grasses. It was peaceful.

   "Um, excuse me?"

    Zayn jumped nearly a foot out of his skin at the voice from behind them. His skin was covered with goosebumps and his heart was pounding as he slowly turned his head around to look at the person who called to them.

   The man was probably about the same age as him and Harry by the looks of it. He was standing on a sand dune about two or three feet from them in a pair of running shorts, a Nike hoodie and what appeared to be Nike sneakers as well. His blond hair was messy like it'd been tossed around by the wind all morning and his cheeks were pink, but from what Zayn couldn't tell.

   "Um, I'm sorry," the man blushed and looked down at his feet, "but, uh, you guys aren't, um, you aren't having sex down here are you?" Zayn blinked at the stranger and gave him a blank look until he registered what he had just asked him.

   Harry and Zayn looked at each other with wide eyes before they both started talking at once.

   "No it's not like that really-"

   "No, no no no, ya see-"

   "We're not really sure where we are, we drank a lot-"

   "And then we woke up and bam! we had legs!"

    Zayn smacked Harry on the head at the last one and gave a nervous chuckle and a look he hoped said _don't listen to this idiot he's drunk._ The man looked between with wide eyes before he started chuckling to himself.

    "It's alright I understand," the man said.

    "Really?" Harry quirked his head. "I didn't really think you'd believe that story." Zayn was shocked too, that's the calmest he's ever seen someone take the whole mereman thing before. Well, he hadn't really seen someone find out before but he's heard stories, and they weren't pretty.

   "Yeah," the man said, "I've had my fair share of black-outs after drinking too much. 'Course it hasn't happened in years for me, but can't really judge. You guys must've had a great deal to drink last night huh?" The man chuckled again and looked out around the beach like he was making sure someone wasn't coming.

   "Yeah I guess so." Zayn mumbled. So the man didn't understand them as well as he thought, but he's taking the rest of this really cool. _Like the fact that we're naked,_ Zayn thought.

   Zayn watched the man rock back on the heels of his sneakers and put one of his hands in his pocket, using the other to rub the back of his neck. "Well, um I just wanted to tell you guys that you should probably get a move on, only 'bout half an hour now till patrol comes round, and you definitely don't want them getting you for indecent exposure."

   That's when Zayn realizes that, oh fuck,they're naked and they've got nothing to put on. _They've got nothing in general._ No place to go, no clothes to put on, not even proper names or credentials.

   The man must notice his panic because he tilts his head to the side and asks, "Do you know who you are?"

   Zayn looks at Harry, and then back to the man, but he has no real answer because honestly, up here on land, they aren't real. They're nobodies.

   The guy widens his eyes and looks at both of them before cursing under his breath and shaking his head. "Christ mates, you guys got absolutely smashed didn't you?" The man looked around and sighed before turning around and running away.

   Zayn watched him until he made it over the dune and out of sight then he turned to Harry who was already looking at him. They both shared a look that meant that they had gotten themselves into some serious shit this time, but looked up with furrowed eyebrows at the sound of someone jogging back their way.

   Zayn was worried it was the patrolmen at first, coming to arrest them, but when he saw the springs of bright blond hair pop over the dune, then rosy cheeks, he knew it was just the man again.

   The two watched in silence as the boy jogged up to them, breathing slightly heavy, and dropped something onto the sand in front of them.

   Zayn looked at the stuff in stupor until he realized that hey, those are clothes. He looked up to the boy who nodded to the both of them and rolled his hand in a circle as if to say _quickly now_ before turning around so they could pull on the clothes on in privacy.

  Zayn looked down at the clothes on the ground, holding up the shirts first and handing Harry the larger white one before sliding on an orange cotton one himself, sizing up the shorts too before very carefully (and slowly) pulling on the shorts.(He did very good for his first time thank you very much, only got stuck once.)

    Once Zayn was sure Harry was fully clothed too (had a small incident with his arm getting caught in the shirt) (the man must think they're really drunk honestly) he told the man he could turn around again.

    The guy turned back slowly even though Zayn said they were good to go, like he was giving them time just in case, and beamed at the two of them whenever he saw that they were, indeed, dressed.

   "So, now that you guys are dressed, I'm Niall." The man said and stuck his hand out to Harry, (They didn't shake hands, no Harry stuck out his fist instead until Niall brofisted him) and then to Zayn (they did shake hands because Zayn has manners thank you very much.)

    "I'm Zayn, and that's Harry." Niall smiled and nodded happily at the two of them. _He must really like to smile,_ Zayn thought. Niall looked at both of them for a second before deciding to ask them another question. "Do you lads know where you live, or where your house is, I can't leave you out here this drunk." Niall looked to Zayn then to Harry, looking far too concerned for two people he just met. _And no Zayn doesn't find that extremely cute_.

   Zayn was surprised when Harry answered first. "No actually, just know our names really."

   Niall shook his head and sighed but his little smile gave him away, "I should've figured as much from you guys honestly." He sighed again. "Come on now, get up and wipe your sorry bums off, you can come home with me for now."

   Zayn looked at Niall with wide eyes, ready to protest, but Niall just rolled his eyes and reached out to give him a hand up. "You're both like a bunch of lost puppies I swear."

    It was shaky getting up for both of them. Zayn was doing surprisingly well for using his legs for the first time, after Niall got him standing (he was swaying like crazy, _thank the lord_ Niall thinks they're hammered) he practiced taking small steps around in little circles.

   Harry on the other hand wasn't doing too hot. It took almost 4 minutes just to get him standing.

    "Jesus, it's like it's your first time walking." Niall chuckled trying to keep a good hold of both of the other's waists as the walked towards where he said he has his car parked.

    _You don't know half of it,_ Zayn thought to himself as Harry laughed like it was one of the best jokes he's ever heard.

   Niall scrunched up his nose at them as the stumbled on to a blacktop parking lot, "You two are one weird lot." He smiled at them again and then picked up his pace when he spotted something up ahead, "Come on there's my car. Let's getting your sorry butts in bed."

 

 

 

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

 

 

   Zayn's not positive how long he's been out, but what he does know is that he feels absolutely refreshed.

    When they got back to Niall's flat Niall shoved an aspirin down both their throats along with an couple of crackers and a cup of water each and then pushed them down the hall towards his room.

   "It's 6 in the morning, why would I need my bed now?" Niall asked when they tried to protest.

   The last thing Zayn heard before he fell asleep was, "I'll be in the living room if you need me." from Niall and a quiet, "I like him." from Harry who was wrapped around his waist.

   Speaking of Harry he wasn't in bed and no where in the room as far as Zayn could see, so he sat himself up and went to go find the others.

   Once he made it into the hall he could hear the sounds of people quietly talking amongst themselves and the sizzling of a griddle.

   He wandered around until he found what looked to be the kitchen but stopped in the doorway when he saw what was going on inside.

   The floors were covered in white, along with the counters, the fridge, and _Harry_. It looks as if it was snowing indoors. Niall was laughing silently, just because he was laughing too hard to breath, his head tossed back and his shoulders shaking his whole body.

   Harry was pouting at the floor, looking like a child that didn't get his way.

    "You're right, you are the Pancake Master." Niall cackled once he could breath.

    Harry huffed and crossed his arms tighter. "How was I supposed to know the flour was open?"

    "Um, maybe by the fact that you opened it up to check to see if it was 'pancake worthy flour'" Niall said as he pointed at Harry.

    Harry pouted and you can tell that if he wasn't caked in white he'd be blushing like crazy. "It's gotta meet a certain standard."

   Niall started laughing again and gave Harry a hug to make him feel better. "It's okay Harry, we can just make some eggs."

   Zayn decided that he could enter now and strategically made his way around the room so that'd he'd get the least amount of flour on him. Once he was close enough to the other two he held up his finger to his mouth to Harry, telling him to _shhh_ , then he carefully reached down and grabbed a handful of flour before, "Good morning Niall."

   Niall blinked in shock, his eyelashes coated in white, flour floating out of his nose and stood with his mouth open until he reached down and grabbed some to throw at Zayn. He pushed it on to his face then smiled sweetly and said, "Good morning Zayn."

    Harry started laughing behind them and Zayn looked back to give him a playful glare before saying, "And what happened here Pancake Master?"

   Harry pouted again as Niall lost it, laughing harder then the last time, causing Zayn to chuckle too. "It's not funny guys, honestly." Harry said.

    "Yes it is, your were dancing around the kitchen singing about you being the, 'Pancake Master' and how 'now one cooks faster' and then you started to rap about bread." Niall cackled again, and Harry finally chuckled too.

 

 

 

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

 

 

 

    It's at about 4 in the afternoon when Harry and Zayn decided to tell Niall about their predicament. Honestly at this point they've got nothing to loose and he did help them out all day today, but it's not fair if they keep lying and saying they "can't remember."

   Harry's the one to enter the living room first (they had the 'team meeting' in the kitchen) and he goes over and stands next to the TV. Once Zayn's standing next to him he clears his throat and says, "We have something we really need to tell you, and it's really important, but we need you to stay calm and keep an open mind."

   Niall mutes the TV and raises an eyebrow at the two before chuckling and saying, "You're not breaking up with me are you?"

   When neither of the boys smile or chuckle back he sits up straighter and frowns. "What is it? You guys can tell me."

   Harry takes a deep breath, and Zayn gives him a nod, telling him to go on. "Well, you see, Zayn and I are, well, we're... mermen."

   Niall looks at the two with a blank expression, blinking slowly between the both of them, looking for any signs that this is a joke. Whenever he sees that they aren't laughing again he looks confused, "You guys are being serious..."

   Zayn nods, "Serious as a heart attack."

   Niall furrows his eyebrows and chews on his lip in thought, and after a few moments of silence he mutters to himself, "That'd explain a few things."

   Harry tilts his head to the side, "What do you mean?" He thought they'd done a pretty good job of acting human.

   "Well," Niall chuckled, "you didn't know like anything, including that shirts were a must to go into places or where you were from, you guys walk like newborn deer, and Harry looked at a flame like it was Jesus himself descending to earth." Harry started to protest but Niall waved him off and said, "You know it's true. It'd also explain your guys fear of sunlight, that was really weirding me out."

   Zayn cringed as he looked around the room. They made Niall close all the blinds in the room and put up blankets in the ones with out them. That definitely wasn't the smartest thing they did for their cover.

   "It's also explains how hot you guys are." Niall said offhandedly as he got up and walked towards the kitchen. "Beer anyone?"

    Harry and Zayn looked at each other wide-eyed before chasing after Niall down the hall towards the kitchen. "What?"

   Niall looked over his shoulder from where he was leaning in the fridge. "You guys want a beer?" Niall asked again.

   Harry rolled his eyes, "You know that's not what we meant." Niall smiled and shrugged his shoulders before pulling out a beer and twisting it open. "Figured I'd try it at least." He took a quick swig of his beer before looking at the both of them and saying, "The mermaid thing explains your guy's good looks. I mean you guys are like, unnaturally hot."

   Harry snorted and said, "I was thinking the same thing about you." Zayn looked over at him with wide eyes. It may be true, Niall was extremely attractive, but they just met the guy and he's already trying to get with him.

   But Niall didn't seem to mind, he actually seemed to be relieved. He started to laugh and said. "Good, be a little awkward if you didn't."  Niall smiled at Harry.

   Zayn felt his cheeks heat up whenever Harry gave him a pointed look and he quietly muttered a quick, "I think your hot too." But he smiled slightly when he glanced up and saw that Niall was beaming.

    "So, about this whole merman turned human thing..." Niall said smiling, "I guess you guys really are lost puppies that I'll have to keep for awhile aren't you?"

   Zayn looked over to Harry and smiled, "Yeah, guess we are."


End file.
